Mr Right...

I don't usually do this. But here I am...and why not!? What do I have to lose?

This entry if for Mr Michael Thompson. Yes, you were on my flight and you sat at Business Class, seat 4B of the Perth to Sydney flight QF566 tonight. You had the fruit juice and just water all night. Maybe you don't drink just like me! For dinner you had the Thai Style Pork with Eggplant Curry on a bed of Jasmine Rice and Steamed Greens. I don't know what you thought of that. I'm not the biggest fan. I would've offered you the Lamb Cutlets with potatoes and Mint Sauce instead which was much better, but before I got to you, they were gone. *shame*

You're really cute, (I mean that) and the little eye contacts we had scared me, only because I'm not used to flirting. In fact I'm so bad at it. I wish I was better at it. I read somewhere that if you make eye contact with someone for 3 seconds and they don't look away, it means they're interested. I lasted a second. Stupid me...

Then you went to the bathroom and hanged out at the galley and we spoke a little. I braved it then. (10 points for me) You said you worked in finance and you're not rich yet. *shame* You were originally from Perth and you said to visit Cotesloe. I wished I spoke to you more and asked where you lived in Sydney and maybe we could go for a drink. Even if we both don't drink.

I wish you were brave enough to ask me my name. And I wish I could've taken a photo of you. I wish.

What I loved most about you was your height. How you were almost as tall as me. This made you less intimidating. I managed to give you a bottled water, another 10 points for me. And then, when I got to give you back your jacket, I realized how you had blue eyes. Do you know how much I love blue eyes???

So, if you were this Michael Thompson, and you googled yourself and found this and well...this is my blog and this is a SHOUT OUT!!!

Tea, coffee, ME???

What a great way to come home to.

I glanced at Ian from Immigration who's sporting a new haircut and Chadi from baggages who shook my hand for a long time.

Nice.

I am in such low moods. I feel like the stars have unaligned and destiny has parted our side.

Justin didn't turn up for work again. I'm sure he has his reasons...

But this week has been pretty empty without him. I wake up and pronounce his name. I go to sleep pronouncing his name. I even wrote a whole page muttering his name and thinking about his image just to summon him back into my life.

Last weeks rosters determined that, if lucky, we'd have at least 15mins spending time with each other. That 15mins was shattered today when he didn't turn up to work.

And I had it all planned in my head too.

I'd finish at 5:15 just as he would be coming in for work. I would run and iron my yellow shirt, splash on my fave perfume, look hawt and then sit by the bar where I work and pretend to read my Twilight book as I waited for my gurl friend to turn up with her cousins. He would be standing at Point looking all confused and jealous. I would smirk secretly...

None of this happened tonight. Shattered!

I picked up next weeks roster which turns out worst than this weeks. He's only working on Sunday (my official day-off) and Monday night where I work by day. Fuck! Cupid has abandoned his post.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

On the upside...

For the very first time, Mitch smiled at me today. I mean he did this on his own accord. It was my Santa hat that did it. But him to initialise a smile was way way worth it. It was sweet I gushed all over. Plus we had a little conversation which is a break in the ice.

Robert came over the bar after his shift and spilt his beans. I like it when he does this and tells me things. I feel a little bit more special. Except I know he speaks to everyone and he's such an open book everybody knows everything about him. Anyways, he was in such a bad mood for being cut plus it didn't help that he was fined by the cops yesterday that he probably felt like everything was going wrong. He wanted to go for a drink with me even if he knew I didn't drink. This is the first I suppose. He's never really invited me to anything. He just wanted company. (hence I shouldn't really place much thought to this) But it was nice. If I didn't have plans already I would've obliged. *sigh* It didn't help that I had a crush on this guy a few months ago.

Martin was also there. He mentioned that it's his birthday on Saturday and he invited me. I have no idea what kind of bar he's into but it's at the Cross. *ooooohhhh* He also once again mentioned when we were going on our mandate?haha Pity he doesn't take anything seriously. Coz if he did, I'd be so up for pashing him. (sans the braces) But since I'm in such low moods and self esteem, this needs a serious act of desperation and go for the fifth next best thing.

That's 3 straight guys who tried to distract me today...what's with me and straight guys??? Loser!

So Plan E, take Robert out to a bar on his next offer and pash him, go out with Martin on Saturday for his birthday, watch him get drunk and pash him, then make a move finally on Mitch and pash him. hahahaha

Even I'm laughing at myself now.

I love you Mitch!

I've been looking for fillers...when my beloved Justin is not at work. Something sufficient just to distract me.

Like for example, Matt's Lebanese hawt hawt ass. Man they're killer buns!!! They kill me. I just want to squeeze them bahby! Plus his short hair has grown a little more again. And he parted it to the side a bit to look more groomed and mature. It was so cute. Then there's his chest. I can't stop looking at his chest when he's talking to me. Yes he shaves them, but when they grow a bit I can see them. Fuck! I just want to rip his shirt off. I wish I could get him uber drunk!!!

Mitch was finally back today. Exams are finished, finally!!! His hair's a little shorter which is cute. Really suits him. I finally realised why he looked different. That's because he tucked in his shirt. Very nice. It made him look even cleaner. I can find myself falling for this guy if I allowed myself. Sowee Justin. I owned it. I saw him speaking to KC and I jumped right in there. I mean I didn't speak to him, I just wanted him to notice me. Then another chance came by at GMax Candy and we'll, I managed to joke around him a bit. I'm glad he feels a little comfortable around me now, than before. I just wish it extend. I'm a little jealous that he's found a friend in Venece. They were doing this cute jump like they were excited. It's great when friendships builds like that. I just wished I was Venece.hahaha I hope I can find a way to get to know this guy better.

Then at kitchen, Wil noticed my hair. He noticed that it was lighter than the other Asian guys at work. He asked me if I was mixed. I'll take that!!!

And finally, the hawt weekend security guard Emed was on shift tonight. And we got to spend a bit more time together. He knows where I work now and where he wants me to be. Plus we get along really well and we get to joke around. I really like Emed. Very boyfriend material, a lot more mature and has big goals in life. I wuv you too...

Crazy thing happened yesterday at work.

As I stood and waited for patrons to come, at...

18:59pm started a long set of prank calls that lasted 'til 19:04pm. 11 pranks altogether.

Then a 5 min break. (like this person went to do something)

Last and 12th prank happened at 19:09pm.

Who could it be?

If I was a sleuth and put this all together, 11 pranks does spell J's name. But if it is J, then why the 12th prank 5 mins later???

11:22pm. My computer speaks to me. A divine message from the universe???

Justin. how do I live without you?

Ok!!! I'll admit it. I'm a stalker. Fcuk.

I don't mean to do it...it's just in me.

It's crossed my mind a couple of times. Just seeing where J lives. See if he lives humbly, just like the rest of us...or does the suburb he mentioned where he lives looks as perfumery as he made it sound to be.

His street name, which I looked up on the White Pages was quite funny. Let's just say that it sounds like a Chinese prostitutes name, so I figured, he must live humbly. The fact that I've looked up his name on the Pages once again suggests that I've got stalker blood in me. Fcuk.

So I looked it up in google maps. And voila. His suburd is right near the beach. What does that say? Beach...mah gawd. Only the rich folks gets to live near the beach. In Sydney anyways. Well we lived near the beach for years up north. We weren't exactly rich. So who's to say?

And then today came. My sister needed a lift to the airport which is kinda on the way where J lives. Time for revelations. I needed to breathe. I needed to see. I needed to know.

J lives near Bexley. A suburd almost an hour away from where I live. Towards the east, you could say near yet not so near the airport. The name itself conjures of images of nice beach houses. I fear for the worst.

After 25 minutes of driving around, night has fallen. It was a little difficult to find house numbers in the dark. Luckily, I've had plenty of practise as I was a Diether Ocampo in the past and delivered pizza for Pizza Hut in our area.

I entered the street. I had to take another deep breath. I wasn't really quite sure what I am expecting. Why the curiosity? Why the need to know everything about him?

The suburb was hilly and was full of tall old thick trees. I passed a bridgelike kinda road which held only one car at a time. Odd. I've never seen one of those before? The houses varied from one storey flat houses to huge massive ones. At the beginning of his street lay old bricked house, no different from the houses where I lived. A sigh of relief? Also here, they had small bins for Monday pick-ups, whilst we've swayed more to the bigger ones. A sign of wealth? I beg to argue.

I squinted my eyes to the number the first house presented. It was the number 3. Fcuk. As far as my investigation goes, he lives in an even number way above the 50s.

So I drive and drive. Small house, small house, small bricked house. *phew* I have nothing to fear after all...well until...

Until I crossed an intersection. And vaboommmmm...huge looking Italian houses popped out of nowhere. WTFcuk???

I calm my heart. Surely, he must live at the other end of the humblier side of town. In a house where I wouldn't feel threatened by his upbringing. Where his princessness won't get in the way of our future relationship. Where we could be us and no materialism would distract us from our views. The way he described his father, well, maybe he's not that well off. Well...until...

Until I crossed to another intersection where the shops laid. There was a nice nifty shop that was starting to display their Christmas wares. I love nifty shops like that. So unique and so full of new ideas per season. It must be a wealthy kind of area to have shops like that. All we have in our area our Indian stores as novelties.

I pass a house and it bore the number 94. Shite. I've passed his house 20 houses ago.

I do a U-wy and drive back to the wealthy area of the street where the houses looked like Italian mansions. My heart palpitates once more.

I get even more nervous as I pass a house full of lights. Shite. People are walking out. That could be his house and they've just had a small party with the relos. I breathe a sigh of relief as I saw the people that dwelled in that house. They looked like Italians. He's not Italian. (though he could pass as one). I search for the number from the well lit mansion. It was 76.

And there and then, my heart dropped as I realised what street number he possessed. Yes folks...it was the house right next door.

And it's a fcuking mansion.

My future husband lives in a mansion! With big windows, a big backyard that's nicely renovated and nicely secured with strong modern fences. The modern door was twice the size of our house door. They had a big living room upstairs with open windows right where the people could see. It was modern, magnificent and my heart fell...

I can't believe the bastard is loaded.

Just as he looks. Which explains the trip to Greece. The exclusive school. Almost everything.

I don't quite know how to handle this...

You know when you look forward to something so much that you set your heart into it and you prepare like you've never prepared before.

Today was like that.

What a let down. (again)

Justin wasn't at work. Not his fault. He just wasn't rostered in.

It's just... he told me that the usual days he works was Mon, Wed, Thurs and Saturdays. But he's been meaning to take Saturdays off and change his availability. So that leaves me with 3 days to see him.

Except on the days they don't roster him in.

My future is looking bleak by the minute. :(

La la la La la la la la La la la La la la la la

I just cant get you out of my head Boy your loving is all I think about
I just cant get you out of my head Boy its more than I dare to think about

La la la La la la la la

I just cant get you out of my head Boy your loving is all I think about
I just cant get you out of my head Boy its more than I dare to think about

Every night Every day Just to be there in your arms

Wont you stay Wont you lay

Stay forever and ever and ever and ever

La la la La la la la la La la la La la la la la

I just cant get you out of my head Boy your loving is all I think about
I just cant get you out of my head Boy its more than I dare to think about

Theres a dark secret in me

Dont leave me locked in your heart Set me free

Feel the need in meSet me freeStay forever and ever and ever and ever

La la la La la la la la La la la La la la la la

I just cant get you out of my head I just cant get you out of my head
I just cant get you out of my head...

Justin...I don't know what to do. Ikaw lang ang laman ng isip ko. :'(

HE HAS A FUCKING GIRLFRIEND!!! FFFFUUUUUCCCCKKKK!!!

Or so he says...

I'm such a bad boy for taking a secret pic of Justin like this. But I just have to share him with the world. Kasi he's soooooo sooooo GORGEOUS and his eyes, my gawd, I could drown in his eyes.

So what if he's only 16. So what. (this is the age they are horniest the most, I think)

I spoke to him briefly today. Just small chatter. Maybe it's just me ha, pero, he really gets nervous around me. But he stares. Those looks that he gives me. Like he wants to tell me something else. Something. Like maybe...just maybe, he might feel the same way???

On a more positive note, meet my other boyfriend, Jake Silberman. Shhh...he doesn't know it yet.

He's the other half of "Nuke" and he was introduced to me whilst the blogger world bombed and raved about them last year as they heated up the screens on As The World Turns.

I'm not much of a fan of Van (though their on screen connection is hawt and that deep inside, I am probably a Van).

I HEART Jake because he's tall and gorgeous, kinda nerdy yest sporty, has a swimmer's thinnish body and has creamy clear white skin and pink nipples and I just wanna eat him all up. Whoops...got carried away there.

But he is my dreamboat. I'd definately fall for a confused straight guy who would dump his girlfriend to be with me. Awwww...

This was taken yesterday at the 22nd Annual Broadway Flea Market in New York City where some cute actors like Dylan Bruce, Derek Keeling and Jake Silberman (to name a few) to greet fans and sign some autographs. Isn't he gawgeous!!!

On some other note...I've taken the plunge and introduced myself to the new kid Justin lurking around on Floor who's the recreation of Adonis I swear! In fact, he looks kinda like Jake, only shorter, a lot more curly hair and the sky bluest eyes you'll ever see in a teenager. He's so cute!!!I could just lick him up. I'm going to play my cards around him... (man I sound like a pae-do-phi-le)

Here's my favourite Nuke scene (pay attention to that magical heated moment):

His name just came up again. In conversation. Yes crush ko sya talaga. ~tsuper!!!~

Eh kasi punta dito yung eXcellent prend ko para bumisita. Pinsan sya ng eXcellent prend ko. Close sila kaya feeling ko close na rin kami pag-pinaguusapan namin sya.hahaha ~taray~

So anywayz, his name, Marcos, came up agen. ~kilig~ Kasi nagmeet kami about 2 weeks ago. ~sa Ever~ Intrigued tuloy yung eXcellent prend ko. Akala nya kasi nung nag-meet kami ni Marcos, tsuper sandali lang. Di nya alam, gumimik pa kami nung gabing yun.hahaha Di daw sinabi sa kanya ng pinsan nya yun? ~akala ko ba close sila?hehe~ Pero walang malisya. Kasi kasama ko din yung Kuya ko nung gabing yun (diba kwento ko na to noon?) at yung mga pinsan ko rin. Bali, saling pusa lang sya nun. Pero game na game sya. ~j'adore~

Tanong nung eXcellent prend ko "So tell me about MY cousin?" ~akala ko ba close sila? anu ba yan?hehe~ Ala naman akong makwento masyado kasi baka magive-away ko ang pagkaZaidush ko. ~patay tayo dyan~ Sabi ko lang "…medyo sensitive si Marcos ngayun. Kasi he gained weight di ba. Sya na ngayun ang nangunguna sa yo pag meet mo sya. Bago ka pa makapagsalita sasabihin na nya "Taba ko no?" Galing! Ok nga yun kasi di mo na kailangang sabihin sa kanya at di sya hurt feelings di ba?!" tawa naman si eXcellent prend.

Palagi daw sinasabihan ni eXcellent prend na lumabas sya! ~baka para makapag-excercise. haha~

Sa isip-isip ko, ang gwapo-gwapo nga ni Marcos ngaun kahit medyo chubby sya. Fafang fafa ang dating. ~peksman~

Eto pa, bumaba si Kuya at nakisali sa conversation namin. Kasi nga kasama sya sa gimik. Eh mas close sila ni Kuya kasi they can talk about boys stuff; cars, girls, bars with dancing girls ~yawn~ And Kuya mentioned in the conversation that para daw pansin nya di masyadong in si Marcos sa gf nya kahit na mention nya sa palagi. Kasi nung kumain kami sa restaurant, he mentions that his gf lives nearby, but doesn't make any efforts to ask if she could join us? ~kilig~

The boy-kilig-to-max in me is hooraayyying, but then again, he could just be shy to ask. Kasi nga gimik namin.

Si tsuper eXcellent prend naman umoo. Like she agrees he's really not into her that much. ~kilig uli ako. Baka may chance pa ko!!!~

The conversation went on. It was nice. And to end, I found out na ang birthday ng Fafa ko ay October 10th. Ay sayang...di ko sya na greet!!!